The minefield that co-workers and companies navigate when it
comes to love at work has gotten even more complex following the recent
flood of sexual misconduct allegations roiling Hollywood, politics and
the media.
Office relationships that might have flown
under the radar particularly those between boss and subordinate are
getting a new look. And even those who might be looking to ask a
co-worker on a date are thinking twice.
"People need to
think hard before they enter into a workplace romance," said Pennell
Locey, a human resources expert at consulting firm Keystone Associates,
who knows how complicated love can get in the workplace: She married a
co-worker.
"One positive thing coming out of this is
people are getting educated about what are the boundaries you should be
conscious of," she added. "It kind of takes if off autopilot." The
office is one of the most popular places to find a lover. One out of
four/24 percent of employees reported they have been or are currently
involved in a workplace romance, according to a survey by the Society
for Human Resource Management.
Increasingly organisations
are implementing a written or verbal policy on workplace romance 42
percent in 2013 versus 25 percent in 2005, according to the most recent
data available from the society. Most rules outlaw relationships between
bosses and subordinates or push for "love contracts," where workplace
couples are required to disclose their relationships.
But some people ignore the rules.
"You
can have a handbook and a policy and they'll ignore everything in
there, including the CEO on down," said Joanne P. Lee, a vice president
at N.K.S. Distributors in New Castle, Delaware, and who has worked in
human resources for 35 years. "Sometimes they think, 'Oh, this doesn't
pertain to me.' And I think that's what got everyone in trouble."
Workplace romances have long played a part in pop culture, whether in the films Broadcast News, Working Girl, Anchorman and Love Actually, or on TV shows like Mad Men, Cheers, The Office, and Moonlighting.
One top song this holiday season is Garth Brooks' "Ugly Christmas
Sweater" with a line about "that pretty little girl from accounting."
In
the real world, workplace relationships have been for better, and
worse: Bill Gates met his wife Melinda at the office. Former Detroit
Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick landed in prison because he lied under oath about
his extramarital affair with a staffer.
The propriety of
consensual work relationships is getting renewed attention this week,
after PBS announced it was suspending TV host Tavis Smiley following an
independent investigation by a law firm, which uncovered "multiple,
credible allegations of conduct that is inconsistent with the values and
standards of PBS." His show's page at PBS was scrubbed on Thursday.
Smiley responded to the allegations on Facebook, saying PBS
"overreacted" and calling it "a rush to judgement." "If having a
consensual relationship with a colleague years ago is the stuff that
leads to this kind of public humiliation and personal destruction,
heaven help us," he said. "This has gone too far. And, I, for one,
intend to fight back."
Office relationships may grow more
secretive if there is a knee-jerk reaction to try to outlaw all office
romance, said Amy Nicole Baker, a psychology professor at the University
of New Haven who has studied the topic.
"We know from at
least my work and some other peoples' work that if you try to stamp out
consensual attraction in the workplace, you just drive it underground,"
she said.
The experts say workplace romances always
fraught, risky propositions have only gotten more anguished following
the uncovering of abuses at offices nationwide. "Saturday Night Live"
recently featured a skit with an overwhelmed HR manager reminding
everyone of the rules.
Joshua Lybolt can understand why
companies are responding aggressively to new allegations, but he also
understands workplace relations: He founded Lifstyl Real Estate in Crown
Point, Indiana, with his wife, Magdalena, the same year they were
married.
"From an employer standpoint, I think they're
probably taking it too far, but I understand that from a risk-management
issue, they want to mitigate conflict as much as possible," he said.
He
said it's just good policy to keep relationship issues out of the
workplace. His company, which employs another married couple, has
avoided problems, but "we all know how relationships can turn." Just to
be safe in his own marriage, he and his wife eventually started working
from different offices.
